When You Are Your Worst Enemy

Image by Pexels from Pixabay.

Recently I realized for the first time something wonderful: that I do have my back. If I need me, some support, help I can totally count on myself. I am my own rock. And I realized that because when I most needed support and help (going through my B12 deficiency and Meno(pause) hell) and I couldn’t count on anyone but me, I did have my back. Woo-hoo!

All the way through.


It feels homy, cozy, warm, powerful.

It gives you confidence, encouragement, hope, resilience, strength.

Having said that, there is another less wonderful side to this, I believe, same coin: at times I can also be my worst enemy. That presents itself as that little voice inside that doesn’t think I am capable of or qualified enough or has a particular talent or what it takes to go for whatever I aiming for or dreaming about. That inner leash that keeps me prisoner, that bitch who doesn’t let me go, rock’n roll. That part of myself that clearly doesn’t have my back. Instead, holds it, tight.

It feels scary, moldy, restrain, suffocating.

It makes you not only doubt yourself but totally lose the faith in you.

You feel lost, disconnected, apart, an alien in your life.

It keeps you down, sad, unwillingly to move.

And you get stuck. Even aware of it.

Because unless the enemy within becomes a friend, or at least a frenemy, at times, the effect of this side of the coin will remain the same.

And how to make peace with the enemy within?

Well, I’ve got a plan. 😉

One Thing You Should Know About Introverts

For any introvert person, being social is a draining thing. Full stop. And this is not related to bad energy around or anything like this. So, don’t take it personal if you aren’t an introvert. Obviously that this can make things even drainer for any introvert but still, it really doesn’t matter how pleasant or unpleasant the experience is, how good vibe or bad vibe a person or a group of people is, socializing it’s always draining. Because interacting with people are draining for us.

Image by StockSnap from Pixabay.

And honestly, as far as my experience as an introvert goes, being social virtually is pretty much the same as being social in person. It’s still a draining thing.

At a first glance being social virtually could seem like a good opportunity for us introverts to mingle more easily since apparently we are kind of protected, shielded from different sides of a computer’s screen (or phone/tablet). But the truth is we are not. Because the draining problem isn’t related to shyness but the energy we tend to expend when socializing. It’s all about energy. Therefore, it really doesn’t matter where that socializing thing happens, if it’s in a living room or in a chat room. We will feel drained with this experience, regardless.

And because of that we might need to leave a chat or a party a little earlier than most and get some alone, quiet time to recharge right after that. And for as long as our “introvertness” needs to recover.

Unfortunately or fortunately, socializing is a draining thing that we, introverts can’t skip nowadays since socializing virtually or in person is a big part of our social and professional lives. It’s a must if we wanna keep in touch with friends and family and if we wanna grow professionally. It’s simply impossible don’t incorporate that.

It’s our onus to the bonus. And we try to deal the best we can with it.

And if you want to know more about Introverts, here is a link with other interesting issues about it.

Those Days When You Feel Overwhelmed With So Many Things To Do…


Hehehehe But it is so true.

Every time I have a lot of things to do, a lot of ideas coming to me, a lot of decisions to make or something I consider great is developing, I feel so overwhelmed that the only thing I can do is to step away from it and let it sink. For a while. So I stop thinking about it, I give it a time, relax or do something else and after this pause I go back to the ideas or things I have to get done, to decide, to organize mentally.

And I do think this is a good approach. It takes a bit of the edge of it. It gives me a refreshed perspective.

Having said that, sometimes it takes me way too long to go back to them. But it does because I am afraid to make a poor decision, to screw up a great idea… It is more fear than overwhelming. Fear of failure. Fear of making mistakes. Fear of not being perfect… the usual.

In those cases, facing it, breathing through it and doing it anyways it is the way to go.

Age Is Not Just A Number

Age is THE number.

Image by Mystic Art Design from Pixabay.

The number of years we have lived so far, we have experienced life.

The number of years we have learned, grown…

The number of years we had to meet people, know different places, different cultures, read, write, study, rest, exist.

And this is a major deal… A major number.

The praising number not a sorry number. We all should own it.

Celebrate it.

Cherish it.

Be proud of it.

After all, we are here, alive, breathing and kicking…

And ready to add more blooming years to this age number.

Do Everything With Intention

Every time you practice some thing, anything Zen or Spiritual like Meditating, Lighting up an incense, Practicing Yoga, Walking in nature barefoot, Clearing the vibe from a room try doing it with intention. And declare it loud (even if it is only in your mind) and clear so the Universe can be in sync with you and your intention. And have your back. Also you can resonate with that intention, amplify it, make it stronger, more powerful, closer to you.

And your declared intention can be anything, really. Just like those examples:

Let me reconnect with my intuition.

That today I can manage to do anything.

Wishing this smoke bring a clear energy.

I want to have a clear vision of what I want for my life from now.

That I am capable to decide wisely.

Wishing the world tolerance, love and peace. Of mind included.

Here I am reconnecting to myself and nature.

Show me the way.

Need clearance on how to get that job I really dream of.

I need guidance to find my bliss.

And so on and on. And on.

See? That simple.

And let the energy of your intention be your vibe, your companion for that practice.

Focus on it.

And let it unfold as it is.

Accept it.

Embrace it.

Vibrate on it.

And let it be.

This is something I am trying to add to my Zen/Spiritual routine these days. Make it a habit. And I am because I have kept on hearing some of my Yoga teachers asking us to put an intention to our practice of that particular day in the very beginning of it. And by doing so I understood how it is important to do some thing, anything with a purpose, with an intention.

Plus this end up being a good opportunity to talk to and hear myself. It is like a connection that is made. A deep one. It is like a prayer. Because that is what a prayer is: a declaration of our intention. To God, The Goddess, The Universe, Mother Nature…

That is why I thought it would be a good idea to incorporate that to any Zen/Spiritual practice of mine.

So good idea that I am considering to bring that philosophy to other areas of my life. Living a life with intention. A declared intention.

Because quite frankly, do anything with intention and all that intention brings, Zen/Spiritual or not, it is a pretty good idea, a pretty good mindset.